Vanity Plates...

Okay, so I'm driving home today and began to think about vanity plates. There was this car that was probably being held together by luck and duct tape. It looked like the person who was driving it must be on their last penny. Yet, the car had vanity plates. I don't remember what they said but I do remember that I couldn't figure what it meant. I think it said something like, "dot2dot"??? Vanity plates can be entertaining yet I don't quite get why people have them. They aren't cheap so I really didn't understand why this person had them. In fact I think they are too much money and I don't see why I should pay someone, especially the DMV, to be able to say what is on my mind. No, I believe in free speech.

I would however seriously think about paying for vanity plates if I could put them on other peoples cars. Think about it. You don't like the way someone is driving and instead of them getting a ticket they pick you to decide what should be on their vanity plates for the next year. Here are few ideas I thought of just based on watching others driving on my way home today:
"baddriver"
"2dum2bsaf"
"speeddope"

If I gave it more thought I'm sure I could come up with some more. If you have ideas (PG Rated only) I'd love to see them. Post a comment!

Walked again!

Okay, so it is starting to feel like I post a lot about the walks I take. I guess I do and you'd think I was in really good shape or something but that really isn't the case. I just keep pretending I will be in good shape some day. Actually my walks are therapeutic and often very spiritual as I find myself having long conversations with God when I'm walking.

On a recent walk I was questioning why I was out there. The thermometer said it was 96 degrees out. I don't know how high the humidity was but I'm guessing it was 99.9%. I only guess that because I think it actually has to be raining to be 100%. There was NO wind so despite the fact that it was late in the day it was stifling.

I was determined to burn more calories so I worked hard to do each mile of the four mile walk in 20 minutes. When I'm in good shape I can walk a mile in about 12 minutes but I'm not anywhere near that kind of shape. As I worked hard at my 20 minutes/mile pace I began to wonder if I was insane. No one else was out there. How crazy or desperate does a person need to be to walk in this kind of weather? And do you get extra calorie credits? And when the air is that thick and stagnant do you burn more calories? I have no idea.

When I was almost done with mile #3 I went through this little wooded area. Right in the middle of it there was this little spot of cool air. By cool I'm guessing it was about 90 degrees instead of 96. Just enough to notice it. Suddenly my memory took me back to summers in Wisconsin and swimming in the lake as a little girl. You'd be swimming along and every once in a while you'd hit a cool spot.

It was such a sudden surprise to swim into that little refreshing spot of cooler water. The same is true on my walk. To suddenly go through a spot where it was obviously cooler was a wonderful surprise and somewhat refreshing. But now that I'm home I'm left to wonder if it really happened at all. Was there really a cooler spot of colder air or did I just imagine it? Or was I overcome due to the heat and exercise? Maybe I was burning so many extra calories, walking in that thick stagnant air, that my mind was playing tricks on me. I guess I'll never know for sure.

Breath of life

Sunday at church we sang the praise song called "Breathe". This song always touches my soul. The words go something like this:
"This is the air I breathe. This is the air I breathe. Your holy presence, living in me. This is my daily bread. This is my daily bread. Your holy Word spoken to me. And I'm desperate for You. And I'm lost without You."

As I sing this song, quietly in the place I stand with my head bowed, I breathe in and fill my lungs with air imagining that I'm filling my very soul with God's presence. Then when I exhale I imagine that I am letting out all the things that don't belong in His holy presence. As I did that this week I began to wonder about "breath" and so I've decided to do a Bible study on it.

The first verse I found with the word "breath" in it is Genesis 1:30
"And to all the beasts of the earth and all the birds of the air and all the creatures that move on the ground—everything that has the breath of life in it—I give every green plant for food." And it was so."

I did a word search on "breath of life" and found 8 verses with that phrase. From Genesis, all the way to Revelation. "Breath of life" seems significant as it speaks to God giving man and/or creatures the breath of life. Without it, we die. Genesis 1:30 where it is first mentioned is before God created man. It makes me wonder if God breathes. If He does, what is that like? God does not have a body, like we do and I don't think of Him having lungs. So I wonder, if He breathes, how does it happen?

As I think more on this I am reminded of the many conversations I had with my daughter when she was young. She was often asking me impossible questions. Bigger and harder questions than "why is the sky blue". My response was always the same, "Some day when you are in Heaven you will have to ask God". At one point I even suggested she start keeping a list of the questions she is going to have ask God. So for now, I'll take my own advice and someday God will let me know how and if he actually breathes.

For now, I think I will continue to worship Him in song and let my lungs fill with air as I breathe in and ask God to fill me with His holy presence. Then, I will continue to fill my soul by studying His word and breathe in the wisdom it carries.

The log in my eye...

Have you ever read a Bible verse and felt like it was written for someone else? Mostly, the feeling about wanting it to be about someone else is because it seems a bit harsh, or maybe too true, or it could be that it hits too close to home. A few posts ago I shared the story of the "water tower" and how hard it was to see it when we were closer to it. I think that is good metaphor to consider as you read these verses:

Matthew 7:3-5 NLT
“And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own? How can you think of saying to your friend, ‘Let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye.

Wow, now that's harsh. "Hypocrite", not something anyone wants to be called.

At the beginning of 2007 I took a trip to Singapore to visit my daughter and son-in-law. The picture to the right is a picture I took of the plants that my daughter was taking care of while her mother-in-law was out of the country for a few months. I made fun of her and even felt it was worthy of memorializing in picture and on the internet. She didn't see the humor in it but I assured her it was funny.

Well, the shoe is on the other foot now. Or should I say now that I've removed the log in my own eye I can see more clearly. How hard can it be to take care of a few plants? Water them and watch 'em grow. Really, it should be that easy. However, it is not. I was put in charge of two little plants to care for while my daughter lived in Singapore for a while. Someday, when they come back to the states to live, she wanted to know her plants would be here waiting for her. As you can see by the pictures below, they aren't going to make it...

......................The bamboo plant is dieing of "incorrect planting".
The African Violet, death by over watering and neglect.
.............................
Yes it is all very tragic but a good lesson to learn. Hopefully, the lesson learned with a couple of plants will prevent me from missing other "logs" that may be in my eye when I'm busy pointing out the "specks" in someone else's.

PS: Sorry Kelly, one - for making fun of you, AND two - for killing your plants. :(

Practical Jokes

So I started to wonder why is a practical joke called a "practical joke"? There does not seem to be anything practical about it. Dictionary.com gives one definition as "mindful of the results, usefulness". Most people who make an art of doing practical jokes are not always "mindful of the results" nor do I feel they are ever useful. Occasionally they might be entertaining but usually not to the victim.

Years ago I worked with a person who constantly, like daily, did practical jokes. For some reason I was his intended victim until one day I scared the bajeebers out of him. He was going through one of those spurts where he had to do something every day. Usually it was while I was on an important conference call. His goal was to scare me so I'd scream and be embarrassed. Occasionally he achieved that goal. I was sharing my daily events with Gary when he said "you know, another person would consider this constant barrage of jokes as harassment". My response was, "hmmmmm".

The next day when I finally found the rotted banana he had hidden in my cubicle, after 2+ weeks of trying to find out where that smell was coming from, I took it to his cube. When he finished laughing I innocently said, "Last night when I was talking with my husband. You met him once. Yes the BIG strong looking guy. Anyway, we were talking and in his opinion, he feels that your constant jokes are a form of harassment. AND, he isn't very happy about it." The man's face went white, I saw exactly what fear looks like on someone and in this case it brought me great joy.

He never played another practical joke on me. He also avoided my husband. My question is: did I play a practical joke on the practical joker? Let me know what you think.

Men and Directions

This past weekend Gary and I went to a small town about 30 miles south of where we live. One of his co-workers was celebrating her 60th birthday. When we got to the town I asked Gary what the address is. His response, "she lives by the water tower".

An innocent enough comment that made me wonder if he even knew where we were going. I headed toward the water tower. Here is the thing with landmarks, as you get closer to them they are harder to see. Why? Glad you asked. This area has many trees and it is summer so there are leaves on them making it impossible to see the water tower at all. "Just keep driving around" was Gary's advice.

After a while I asked, "Do you know how much gas costs per gallon right now?" His reply, "We'll find it soon." So I inquired if the sheet of paper that was the invitation had any kind of address on it. He informed it did not but it did have two phone numbers. I suggested we call one of the numbers to get the address but he said, "Oh, not yet. We can find it."

Sooooooo, he suggested we go back to the town square, which really is a town square because it is that small a town. He thought perhaps there might be "another water tower" somewhere. Those of you who know me, I'm sure can guess what I was thinking at this point but I resisted the urge to share it and prayed for patience and understanding. Guess what? There was NOT another water tower. BIG SURPRISE! But we were able to again see the water tower we couldn't see when we were too close.

This time were were smarter and watched carefully as the tower disappeared into the trees so we could guess how many blocks to go down before turning toward it. Eventually we were there, at the base of the water tower. Now the only challenge left was to drive around all the streets and guess which house the party was at. It didn't take too long until we turned down a street that had lots of cars parked on it. YEAH! Eventually we could see a big grill going and a big crowd in one of the backyards. However, I wondered why there wasn't a sign that said "Happy Birthday" or "Sue turns 60" or "RIP". Ever so gently I said I would wait in the car while Gary checked to see if this was the right place.

Uncomfortable with that he said "Let's keep driving". This time I couldn't keep the thoughts in my head out of my mouth. "WHAT? How about calling one of those numbers!!!!!!" While we discussed it we kept going down the street and soon saw another party going on. This time there were balloons in the front yard with "60" on them. YEAH, we were there!

Morale of the story: You really don't need to have directions or actually know where you are going as long as you have a man in the car who won't ask for directions and who doesn't care how much gas you waste trying to find the place.

Gotta love um!

"Rend your heart", God.

I've been on this kick lately to use words that you don't hear much anymore. I was talking to this woman who is going through a very tough time. This has been a long journey lasting years and I asked her to tell me the last time she felt "radiant". Radiant, that isn't a word you hear much. Pretty, beautiful, gorgeous; now those words I hear. Often, so often they don't seem to hold much meaning anymore. But, RADIANT, now that speaks to something deep that permeates from your soul.

As I looked into God's word I found myself reading through Joel. I'm not sure why, it seems to have a lot to say. Joel 2:12-13 in the New International Version goes like this: "Even now," declares the Lord, "return to me with all you heart, with fasting and weeping and mourning." Rend your heart and not your garments. Return to the Lord your God for he is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love, and he relents from sending calamity.

As I studied these two verses I stopped on the word "rend" and wondered what this is telling me. I looked it up and it means "to rip or tear into pieces." I thought how odd that God would want us to rip our hearts apart but then I looked at the context the word is used in and it started to paint a word picture for me. In old testament times when someone was grieving to the point of "fasting and weeping and mourning" they wailed, LOUDLY, and publicly ripped their cloths because the grief was so deep. We don't mourn like that in our culture today. No we are polite, quiet and mostly cry in private. This word, "rend", expresses something incredible. God wants our hearts to break for Him. He wants us to reach deep inside and see how much we need Him.

And He is not sitting in heaven angry, thinking 'What dopes, will they ever come to me?' No, he is "gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love". When the Bible says "he relents from sending calamity" that tells me that He makes a conscious decision to NOT send bad things my way while He is waiting for me to return to Him. What patience. I pray that I may learn from His example.

May you "rend" your heart to God.
May your heart break for Him as one deeply grieved.
And may you know His peace and His love in your life.

Totally unfair!

Okay, so I decided to go for a walk after we got home from the church BBQ and concert event. Gary and I walked down to the area where I pick up the path. It is close to a school and since Gary had walked with me two days in a row he really wasn't in the mood to do it again. He stayed at the school and shot buckets (basketball) while I went for my walk. There were very dark ominous clouds to the north so I said I would walk fast, watch the clouds and turnaround when it looked like they were getting too close. It had to be over 90 degrees and a minimum of 100% humidity. There was this guy walking about 20 yards in front of me and so I decided that I would easily catch up with him.

How did I know? Well, as I watched him he appeared to be on a stroll as opposed to the power walk I was on. His t-shirt was dry, not any sweat on the back of it. After about half a mile I realized I wasn't any closer to him so I picked up my pace. When I made the mile marker I looked and he was still about 20 yards in front of me, still dry as can be and still looking like he was on a stroll. By now I'm in full sweat, with beads of sweat dripping off my ear lobes and the tip of my nose. I was NOT happy. So I tried harder and picked up the pace one more time.

When I saw I was getting no closer I decided that it must be time to turn around and go back home. I looked at the clouds and just knew that even though they didn't appear to have gotten closer that clouds can change direction unexpectedly and if I didn't turn around right away I could be caught in a dangerous storm. So me and all my sweat turned around and knew we had won!

Well that's my story and I'm sticking with it.