Mothers and daughters

What great holidays this year. Christmas in Florida with my parents and all the kids! New Year's at home with my daughter and son-in-law! My love tank is full, my heart content, my soul at peace.

Yet, leaving Florida is harder each time. Saying goodbye to my mom is harder each time. Our eyes lock and it is as if each one of us wants to say, "stay" and sometimes we even verbalize it knowing it isn't possible. I drive off watching her watch us pull away and typically I'll cry all the way to the airport.

This morning I drove my daughter and son-in-law to the airport. The 30 minutes go by quickly. I wish it was a longer drive but I know that won't change the reality once we get there. We pull up to the curb and I have to fight the urge to just keep the doors locked and never stop the car. The sound of the trunk popping open, so they can get their luggage, pierces my heart. "Be brave" I tell myself, "don't cry that will only make it harder". Yet when I take my daughter in my arms and hug her the tears come anyways.

So now I'm in the car alone, looking at a 30 minute drive back that seems like eternity. I wonder about time and am reminded how short the drive seemed on the way to the airport. I can't stand the quiet. I turn on my radio to a Christian station I like and a new rendition of an old song is playing; "Amazing Grace". I listen to the words and the rhythm and eventually find myself softly singing along. My thoughts turn from saying goodbye to my daughter to God and His amazing Grace! Reminded again of how much He loves me, and how much more He loves my daughter and my mother than I ever could, I am comforted.

And once again; my love tank is full, my heart content, and my soul at peace.