While many blogged, posted and tweeted about the Supreme Court decision...

I met her at the motel she had been staying at. To call it a dump would be overstating its condition. It was deplorable. But it was sleep there, or sleep in the woods. I guess the former was better than the latter. I was honored to be able to get her into a motel down the road that has clean sheets and is really nice. Compared to where she was, it is a palace.

Due to legal and insurance reasons I could not give her a ride to the new location. She would have to take the bus. But I could give her the fare for the bus and take her belongings over in my car, so she wouldn't have to try and carry everything with her on the bus. So here I am, in the parking lot of this ratty place, loading her things into the trunk of my car. I gave her my umbrella for the walk to the bus stop. I watched her walk away and went to close my trunk.

Everything she owned on this earth was in my trunk. Two small bags that had a brush, some shoes and a few other (VERY used) things in them. One tall plastic garbage bag filled with her entire wardrobe and one electric pan she couldn't use because she didn't have a utensil to cook and stir with. There was also one package of cookies and an orange juice container with about one glass worth of orange juice left in it. All her earthly possessions. As the trunk closed, the magnitude of what this meant hit me hard. I got in my car and cried.

This young woman is not simply a product of our failed society. She is a product of choices she made for herself. But before we judge too harshly, she is following in the same footsteps of her mother, and her grandmother. To top it off, she is pregnant. She understands she isn't able to raise a child, she understands abortion is the solution everyone feels is best for her. But she has decided to make an adoption plan for this baby. I am in awe. The 7 months she has to go are going to be long and hard. She knows this. Yet, she is choosing life for her child anyways.

Before going to the new motel to give her the things in my trunk, one of the ladies I work with put together a care package of personal items for her. Shampoo, soap, toothpaste, etc. Not very much, but just some things we had at the center.

Because of the life she has led this young woman is "hard". She is street smart and has survived through difficulties most of us can't even watch in a movie. Hugs don't come easy for her. Just making eye contact seems to be out of her comfort zone. At the new motel, we sign some papers at the front desk and then head to her room. I drive the car around and meet her there. The room is wonderful. No stains on the wall, or bugs crawling across the bed. Clean, fresh, equipped with pillows!! I looked at her face and saw no reaction. When I asked, she responded with "It's nice." Then, I learned she hadn't had a meal since the day before and her main focus was how she would stretch a few cookies and some orange juice. So, we (the pregnancy center) took care of that need as well.

Before I left, I gave her the bag with the personal items in it. She took it and immediately smelled the fragrant fresh soap. She held the bag tightly and tried to hold back tears.

When I left, I was thankful she was in a clean, safe place and she was equipped to get food. But the feeling that overwhelmed me when I closed my trunk, back at the first motel, has stayed with me. To say I am rich and blessed beyond measure has new meaning. Over the weekend I have prayed more and harder for her than I can remember praying for anyone else in a very long time. I try to distract myself by catching up on Facebook but most of the posts revolve around the recent Supreme Court decision. I have been asked what I think about it and I can honestly say, I don't think about it.

A lonely, hungry young woman, is temporarily in a safe place. She clings to the hope that her pregnancy will continue. She hopes the baby in her womb survives. A baby she will not raise. A baby she will place in the arms of another woman. I can't even begin to imagine what that feels like. I can't even imagine what it feels like to have everything you own fit in 3 bags. These are the thoughts that fill my mind, the rest will have to wait.

2014 is in the books!

The interesting thing about the New Year is that we look forward in anticipation for what will come. However, this morning I find myself reflecting on the year past. The reality that 2014 is over seems like the ending to a movie that will have no sequel. 2014 is over, it will never be again. But before I move in to 2015 I wanted to take a few minutes to reflect on 2014. My theme word for 2014 was “revelation”. I kept a daily journal and sought each week to discover something new.

Here is a not so brief recap of the things I learned, or often – relearned. We began the year in a new home that we were renting. An amazing opportunity and a place that felt like “home” the first time I entered it. My theme for this home came from Genesis 32:2, “This is God’s camp (manahaim).”

Week :

1: “God’s greatest blessings are family.”  And it was such a blessing to have my children and their children in our new home. Mom and dad also came down and spent time with us. Our daughter announced she was pregnant and in that moment our family grew by one. J

2: “I hate being fat, BUT, not enough to actually do something about it.” Hmmm, this was a hard reality but true. My mood may have been influenced by the emptiness of the house after everyone left. Or, it could just be true. The battle of the bulge is one I’ve struggled with my entire adult life. I have won a few of the smaller battles over the years and lost weight, but never the war (keeping it off).

3: “I need to be in God’s word more!” As I’m reading through the Bible I find I have more strength, more patience, more love, more wisdom, more peace, etc. It is such an easy step to take. Yet, it is one that doesn't always stay on the front burner.

4: “God wants to rewrite my life story.” Will I let Him?

5: “How much I love my dad.” It is so funny to have this revelation because one would expect it to be obvious. I do feel very close to my mom and probably think more about her and frankly, we just have more in common. Yet, dad is very special as well (when he isn't driving me crazy, hee hee).

6: “God blesses obedience.” Another obvious one. Yet this was a difficult week and I had to confront someone. I wanted to blast the person for the way I had been treated but felt God wanted me to only show love. I honored God and He blessed the results. I stand in awe.

7: “I’m pathetic when I’m really sick. Such a baby.” Enough said.

8: “The battle of self is constant.” Denying myself this week of a pass time I love so I can devote more time to study and reading. WOW, it is hard and I fail more than I’d like.

9, 10, 11, and 12: “I’m not doing what I’m supposed to be doing.” This may confuse some, but God and I know what it means.

13: “No matter how long I live, it will never be long enough.”

14: “Jesus Christ built a team to complete the work He began.” He could have just done it Himself. He had the power to do it all. Yet, He chose to use flawed, imperfect people to finish the work. He knew they’d make mistakes and not do it the right way. Yet, the Christian message did not die when Christ died on the cross. Interesting. Perhaps I need to get better at involving others in the work God has called me to.

15: “God uses ALL things to work together for His good.” Again, not new, just reminded of this in a powerful way this week.

16: I know I had one this week but for some reason I didn't write it down.

17: Reminded of God’s faithfulness this week.

18: “Need to desire to be healthy MORE than I desire to over eat or have ice cream.” Seems like a repeat from week 2. Hmmmm

19: “My mind IS the battlefield.” Reading a book by Joyce Meyers. Hitting a little close to home.

20: “True revelation always demands a response.”

21: Got to see friends from Kansas and their family this week while they were close by on vacation. Food for the soul. Most likely two of the best people we have ever had the privilege of knowing. Love them and their family unconditionally. Thank you Lord!

22: “Trapped L”. That’s all I wrote. A bit hard to remember back half a year but it most likely ties into weeks 9-12. God and I know what this is about.

23: Two this week, “God tears down walls!” and “Each day holds an adventure, my job is to find it – no matter my circumstances.”

24: “I don’t pray for my husband enough.” Wow, this one was a hard slap in the face. He is always on my mind and in my heart but I realized it would be better to think of him less and pray for him more. Not bad advice, thank you God.

25: May have been a busy week or I simply allowed myself to be distracted with other things, nothing written this week.

26 and 27: “Need to remember that ALL the fruit of the Spirit is available to me.” It is a complete package. When God said He gave it to us, He gave it all to us, not just part of it. “Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self-Control. In Christ Jesus I possess all these things!”

28: “Occasionally I know my Bible better than the person preaching.” (Thank you Gary Pauley) This never happened years ago. I hope this means I am growing spiritually.

29: “Jesus is always in the boat with me. Even a sleeping Jesus is better than no Jesus.” And, “Fear is: Forgetting Everything’s All Right. Let go and let God.” When I take my eyes off eternity, things of this earth cause me to be afraid. But, in the light of God’s eternal plans, my minor fears mean nothing.

30: “Looking into the face of my new born granddaughter makes me feel close to heaven.”

31: “I am more irrational about bugs than I ever knew. YIKES! Might be a phobia worth seeing a therapist for.” In my defense, bugs are bigger in Singapore.

32: “A lot of things go on in one short week.” I wrote so much in my journal this week about all I did and saw that after reading it, I was amazed at how much I did. And that was just the stuff I wrote about.

33: “Feel like I’m not where I’m supposed to be in life.” This one AGAIN! God must be trying to get my attention.

34: “Jesus loves me despite my ‘Israelite’ tendencies.” And “I love my daughter beyond words." (always knew this, just had to write it)

35: “God desires (not just wants) our thankfulness.”

36: “Just reminded again this week how awesome God is!”

37: “In calm, or stormy, or uncertain waters…Jesus is in the boat with me. He is ALWAYS in the boat.” Another repeat theme.

38: “LIVE FOR TODAY.” Always knew this, just getting the opportunity to put it in practice this week.

39: “Moses tried to get out of God’s request. God didn't let go.” Gives me hope for me.

40: “I’m not in my lane. L” Hmmm, again!

41: “God’s arm is not too short!” This is important for me to remember. When things seem impossible, with God, they just aren't.

42: LOVE MY FAMILY! Love my siblings! Love my mom and dad!

43: John 1:9 “The true light that gives light to everyone was coming into the world.”

44: Four this week! Found out we had to move. The house that felt like God’s camp was not going to remain my home.

1.       “No matter where my feet are, the stars are always the same.”

2.       “God’s camp is typically not in one place very long.”

3.       “Perhaps God gave me this house so I would better understand how others feel about their homes.”

4.       “During this week of prayer and fasting, I felt more in tune with God than any other week this year.”

45: “Trust and obey. There is NO better way to happy in Jesus but to trust and obey.”

46: “I’m lost. On my own, I’m just lost.” So thankful to have God, my husband, my kids, my parents, my siblings, my friends, and others in my life. I’m just no good on my own.

47: “Mission work always involves sacrifice.” World missions, home missions AND personal missions.

48: “God truly is the God of details.” Amazed at how much I saw that this week and in wonder at how much I may have missed.

49: “I love my job. Thank you God.” Started new job this week. Moved to Ocala area. Temporarily staying with parents, or “visiting” for an extended unknown period. Perhaps this is my lane. Perhaps this is what I’m supposed to be doing. Perhaps the 11 months leading up to this, the stirring in my soul, was all preparation for this change. Who knows? God does. J

50: “I miss my mother-in-law more than I even knew.” Saw a woman at church who reminded me of her. My heart stopped beating and I couldn't even breathe. Holding back tears was impossible.

51 and 52: Didn't write much this week and didn't write anything in the margin of my journal regarding my theme word of “revelation”. But on December 29^th I had an incredible ride into work on a very foggy morning. It was worthy of its own blog entry titled Fog. Look it up if you are interested.

So, 2014 has been quite a year! As it came to an end I began praying about a theme word for 2015. Then it struck me, the word for next year is LOVE. Wonder what God will teach me in the next twelve months.